BestUCanB, I was to have completed the article on the second person who we were going to highlight in Heart and Mind Matters this week. But I spent too much time outdoors last week fixing the fence that I was unable to send it to “Katherine” for her prior approval. So I on Monday I was stuck with what do I write about?

I tried many times to find an inspiring topic all day, something with real meat in it that would get your juices flowing and you would all be riveted to your computers, compelled to continue reading … 

Well, I will be the first to admit I am sentimental and hopeless romantic and I couldn’t find a topic.  Why? Because my thoughts always kept wandering off towards Tina. She left last Thursday for Ottawa for a weekend Retreat and returns Monday night.

I can and will admit even after 27 years of marriage to this wonderful boundless energetic mistress of joy I still miss her so much while we are off doing our own things. When we are apart.it almost feels painful to be separated from her.

When we are close I never have to go looking for her as I somehow energetically know where she almost all of the time. 

E.g. When we have been separated in malls or large big box stores I have always know where she is without ever discussing a meeting or rendezvous point.

When one of us travels by plane it feels like the connection is lost because of the speed of the separation… Apparently my heart connection can’t travel at 900 KM an hour…

“When I am with you, we stay up all night.
When you’re not here, I can’t go to sleep.

Praise God for those two insomnias!
And the difference between them.”

Rumi

So I surrender to the divine and decided let’s talk about love and relationships since that’s what keeps coming up for me…

Falling in love is easy… Staying in LOVE is F’ing hard work. You don’t stay in love without continually working at it. The moment you stop working at love, is the start of the dangerous path of falling out of love.   I believe if you catch it early enough you can re-ignite the passion and bring back the love in your relationship. But left to long on autopilot and your relationship is in serious if not fatal jeopardy.

If you are in a relationship or plan on EVER being in a sexual or non-sexual relationship with anyone I suggest you get a hold of a copy of the book “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman and do the exercises together.

Tina and my love languages are both physical touch and quality time.

So you now know one of the reasons I miss Tina so much when we are apart. I measure love by how much time we spend together. I feel less loved when we are apart.

If we are not facilitating a workshop, we hug and hold hands a lot. To satisfy the  love language of physical touch we almost never forget to kiss, hello, good bye and good night.

So knowing each other’s love language has helped us stay in love because we are able to talk the same love language to each other.

P.S. Knowing the love languages of all your friends can go a long way to maintaining a healthy relationship with them as well

So BestUCanB whats your love language???

In Light and Love

Neil and Tina